No, She’s Not a Racist. You Just Have Issues

Tea Party activist Marilyn Davenport sent off this really funny graphic in a email:

Har...Har...

Of course, some people who apparently "can't take a joke", denounced the graphic as racist, for some inexplicable reason, but to her enduring credit, Davenport defended herself:

"Oh, come on! Everybody who knows me knows that I am not a racist. It was a joke. I have friends who are black. Besides, I only sent it to a few people--mostly people I didn't think would be upset by it."

Hey, come on! She has friends who are black, and it was totally a joke and everyone knows she's not a racist and what's the big deal, right?

Not only is there a history of dumb-assed racist teabagger emails that includes such luminaries of pure decorum as Carl Paladino, but there must be some sort of central clearing house selling flash cards so dumb-assed racists caught being dumb-assed racists can say pretty much exactly the same thing when denying they're dumb-assed racists.

Nothing reveals how much a person has permanent residence in the People's Republic of Wingnuttia, plus a time share in Dumbland than rattling off the "but-some-of-my-best-friends-are" defense.

Note to Marilyn Davenport:

1. You're a racist. Not because your heart isn't in the right place what with all your black friends and all, but because you do racist things. Claiming you are not a racist after sending that bad bit of Photoshop is like a man already on the sex offender registry (analogizing the Tea Party) claiming he is not a pedophile after having to go into the ER to have a 4 year-old surgically removed.  Go on, Marilyn, be a racist. Just roll with it already. Get all the perks of being a racist, like 100% cotton percale sheets, Tyson's chicken discounts and all the Coors you can drink.

2. Those black people, they're probably not really your friends. They call you a cracker behind your back. Black people do that sort of thing. And steal your hubcaps. Or maybe that's Puerto Ricans, I forget. However, if they really are your friends, then there's a good chance that they're not really black. You might want give them a test or two with a brown paper bag, ask them to tap dance, sing one of those old negro spirituals or leave them unattended in a room with some fried chicken, something like that. You know, nothing that would actually upset anyone. Except people lacking your excellent sense of humor.

3. There's no such thing as sending an email "to a few people". Jesus Christ, seriously. Do I have to explain?

4. Marilyn, I would like to say that you are far, far too dumb to hold elected office, but sadly, that's demonstrably untrue.

Update: Because Tea Bagger stupidity is an infinitely renewable resource, Marilyn Davenport further defends herself by cutting her own throat, saying "sorry if my email offended anyone".

Yup. it's the non-apology apology wherein she's apologizing not for her actions, but for other people's reactions to them. Again, to analogize between Marilyn Davenport and a child molester, because it's fun to do, that apology is like a pervert caught balls-deep buggering kids saying "I'm so sorry if my sex life bothers you".

Yeah, because it's everyone else that has the problem.